I was never a cat person...

until I met this guy...

This is Mew.

I always hated cats.  I became allergic to cats at around 13/14.  My sister and father are allergic also.  Even my daughter is allergic.  My mother always said that one never owns a cat - the cat owns you.  Why would I want an animal to run my life?

SAW loves cats!  Bug does too, but she has a hard time with them (she's the allergic one).  I always told my kids that if we ever found a cat that I wasn't allergic to then I would get it for them - no questions asked.  Who knew that would ever happen???

On a trip up to   down to visit Mike's family .... wait... nope, this was the trip where he wrecked the car and I had to drive 4 hours to go pick him up!  Anyways, I decided I would play with some cats.  I had heard that a friend of his had a bunch of kittens running around their house and that if I could catch one I could keep it.  So, temporarily forgetting my allergies we went off in search of a kitten.  We only saw one while we were there, and there was no way we were ever going to catch it, so we went back to his parents house.

Mike was working on something and I was playing with the multitude of cats running around their place. (His Dad had also told me that if I found one I liked then I could keep it, but, of course, we all knew which cats were Dad's & there was no way I would take one of them!).  This guy came right up to me and started purring and rubbing his head on my leg.  I scooped him up & he nuzzled right into me.  He had an injured front paw so I imagine he was glad to be off from it.  I tried to sit down with him, but when I say down and set him in my lap he jumped and took off.  His paw must have hurt badly though because he did not get very far.  He went straight over to the lawn chair and curled up.  I knew I was taking this cat home!  I double checked with Mike's parents and his mom said to go ahead and take him.  I double checked with Mike and he said yes too.  So I loaded up the cat and we drove home.

A 4 hour drive with a cat on my lap ( a very nervous cat ) and I didn't sneeze once!  No puffy red eyes, no itching whatsoever!  It was amazing.

MJ named him Mew.  SAW called him Toby.  He answered to everything!  He tolerated the dogs we fostered too!  He was even litter box trained!  Oh, and he was neutered!  He was IS amazing!

I am also convinced he is either magic or some sort of secret agent like Perry from Phineas & Ferb!  He is always disappearing and then when we open the front door he comes strolling in.  Just about 45 minutes ago Bug brought him downstairs and he sat down on the couch.  Then Mike was leaving for work and opened the door and there he was!  We don't have any pet doors, and the garage door isn't open.  There is no reasonable way he could have gotten out there.

This cat is amazing!

Napping

Sweet Walnut Scones

Sweet Walnut Scones

(adapted from Cooks.com)



3 1/2 C Unbleached all purpose flour
5 tsp. double acting baking powder
1 tsp. salt
Sugar (I used light brown sugar)
1/2 C butter

1/4 C Crisco (regular or butter flavored)
4 eggs
1/2 C milk
1 T maple or maple flavor syrup
1/2 C walnuts, finely chopped



1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees.  In medium bowl with fork, mix flour, baking powder, salt, and 2 tablespoons sugar. Cut in butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs.

2. In small bowl with fork, beat eggs. Reserve 2 tablespoons beaten egg for brushing on scones later. Mix in milk & maple syrup into remaining beaten eggs. Stir egg mixture into flour mixture just until ingredients are blended. (MJ had a blast helping stir!)  Then mix with hands *squishy squishy* until all flour is incorporated.

3. Turn dough onto lightly floured surface and shape into a disk.  Place onto round stoneware (or lightly greased cookie sheet) I cut mine into 10 pieces (like a pizza), but you can cut yours to whatever size suits your needs.

4. In a small bowl stir walnuts and 2 teaspoons of sugar (MJ and Bug chopped the walnut with the Ninja Blender and then mixed in the sugar.  MJ loves to push the button!) With a pastry brush, brush tops of scones with reserved beaten egg; sprinkle with walnut mixture. (I am not fortunate enough to have a pastry brush right now so I just used the back of a spoon.  Worked just fine! I also smoothed out the Walnut mixture and patted it into/onto the tops of the scones.) 

Bake scones 12-15 minutes until golden. Serve warm.

If you bake them ahead of time you can heat them back up by wrapping them individually in foil and putting them in the over @ 425 for 10 minutes.   I like to put mine in an airtight container and munch on them hot/warm/cold all day long.  The original recipe says that it will make 30 scones.  those must be pretty small scones.  The walnut mixture makes a nice crust on top and the maple syrup adds just a hint of sweetness.

What the family thinks:

MJ had hers with a little tea - she liked  dipping it (maybe I should try to make her some biscotti).  Bug likes everything warmed up & asked for 2nds so I am sure she likes them.  

 SAW is slowly savoring his (because he knows he can't devour the entire pan in one sitting), but assures me that they are good despite their minimal flavor (he wants more sugar in them next time).

I love the crunchy crust of the walnuts and the light sweetness.  The Crisco made them have nice flaky layers without ruining the density & texture that a scone usually has. 

Mike is sleeping (night shift again) so he hasn't had one yet, but it has all the elements he loves so I am sure they will be a hit with him as well.

All in all I think it was a great recipe.  Next time though I think I'd like a few walnuts mixed in to the scone.  We will see!

Using up the last of it!

In general I like to use things up.  I know that's an odd statement but it's true. Like when I use a pencil or crayon down to the last possible nub, or use up all the ink in a pen (before I lose it).  It's an oddly satisfying feeling.  I like to use up every last drop of toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner.  Everything!  I like to know I am not being wasteful.
Oddly enough, though, I never really felt that way about food.  I mean, when you use up the last slice of cheese in the middle of making grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner that's defnintely NOT satifying!  Or the last drop of milk before everyone has had their cereal.  UGH!
Today was different though.
First I haveto rewind a little though...
Two weeks ago (last paycheck)...
Bug and I went grocery shopping, list & coupons in hand.  We knew our budget ($250 this check, which was a big deal because we have been keeping it under $200 for the last month).  With such a "big" budget I was planning on getting some snacking foods.  A luxury that we don't often enjoy.  I started out doing very good at keeping track of my total and watching for good deals (with or without coupons).  Slowly, as I weaved up and down the aisles, I began to resent the budget I was given.  I was angry and resenting a lot of things.  I stopped keeping track of my total.  I was feeling a little ... who knows, but the point is that I stopped keeping track.  I had a rough idea, I was still watching prices. I gave up the yummy tasty $5 box of cereal for the less yummy less tasty $2 box of cereal, even Bug knew that was the right choice!  I felt like I was within my budget, and I thought that with all my awesome coupons I would actually be under budget so I could maybe sneak in a few other things at a different store.  At the check out I am normally nervous.  I try to watch to make sure things ring up correctly and to make sure that I am on target for the right total.  This time, though, I was dreading that total!  My resentment had given way to guilt.  I should not have gotten so many cans of nuts (especially after learning that one of my precious planters coupons had *gasp* expired!),but I felt a little embarrassed that they might know we are poor and on a tight budget if I put them back. Hello, Sharon!  You are shopping with extreme couponer coupons, they already know you are on a tight budget!  So I watched my total climb.  I listened to the cashier call over a manager about one of my coupons (ladies, if you ever receive a "mystery savings" coupon be prepared for a lengthy discussion at the check out over whether it's valid or not before they even try it, and then another one after they scan it and see the amount!).  I felt my blood pressure rise and my face flush.  Finally, I was done!  There was my total - in BIG BOLD numbers for all to see - $262!!!  aaaccckkkk!!!
Needless to say, we ran out "real" food pretty quickly, and the snack food barely lasted a few days. And, did I mention that I did NOT buy ANY meat on this grocery trip???  Not my proudest moment!
It was time to get creative.  This past week we have had a lot of rament noodles.  A lot of stir fry (with ramen noodles or rice). A lot of torillas (homamade) with sugar & cinnamon.  A lot of soup. A lot of oatmeal (with jelly, or peanut butter, or nutella, or whatever makes it so MJ will eat it).
Last night I made amazing refried beans and tortillas.  I started the beans at about 10am (after soaking overnight of course).  It was sooooo hard not to eat them all before dinner.  Everyone was so excited about them that we made the tortillas early and had an early dinner!  The downside to that it that we were hungry again by bedtime, but it was okay!  They were Amazing!!
So, that leads me back to my story of using things up today. 
Today I made Sweet Walnut scones.  I used the very last bit of flour, all the rest of the eggs, and the butter too!  Anyone that knows me knows that these are the three things I HATE running out of most!  Today though, I had a different feeling.  I was pleased.  I had that satisfying feeling when I threw away the flour bag and the egg shells and butter wrapper.
I was proud of myself for providing for my family even after frivolously spending our budget.  We made it - right up to the last day!

Birthdays

MJ is going to turn 2 in a few days!  I'm honestly amazed we've made it this far!  Having a baby in your 30's is tough.It's exhausting, trying, scary and yet joyous.
I feel like I am cheating her on her party though.  I was going to try to plan a big party, but, as always, funds are low.  We still haven't ordered a cake yet.  Yeah, I could make one, but I really don't feel like being disappointed.  We really don't know a lot of people here with little ones, so there's not a huge need for a ton of money to be spent on goodie bags.  I'd still like the few kids that are coming to leave with a little something though.  MJ loves rubber duckies so I ordered some adorable rubber duckie soaps from Etsy.  I wanted to buy a bunch of ducks too, but I procrastinated and times and money ran out.  Pay day is the day of her party so we will be running around like crazy that morning to get everything!  I found some cute printables and decorations I can do ahead of time on Pinterest though, so that'll be great!  I think it will end up being a good day!

My birthday is coming up also.  I have always gotten my hopes up and been super excited about my birthday.  ALWAYS!! But, I find myself a little deflated on the actual day.  I have also learned that birthdays - no matter whose - are for kids.  My kids are more excited about my birthday than I am.  This year, I am determined to not get all pumped up for it.  Whatever will be will be.  I actually already have a plan to volunteer that day at our base library with the reading program.  We will be making and decorating birdhouses that day.  I think it will be a fun way to spend the afternoon. 

I am also planning a few birthday rituals for MJ and myself to leave the negatives of this past year behind us and welcome growth and happiness into our life in the next year. ( I have been researching some of my eclectic pagan-ness and found a few things like this I'd like to incorporate in to our lives. More on that later)

Do you do anything "different" for birthdays in your family?

If wishes were butterflies I wouldn't need them to come true

If wishes were butterflies and the characters in my books were real I wouldn't be lonely.
I'd skip arm in arm with Dorothy and the cowardly lion knowing that I was not the most F'd up one there.
I'd ride the little engine that could up the mountain cheering him on, not worrying if my weight was keeping him from moving forward.
I'd tell Scarlett that it's okay that Rhett doesn't give a damn, she doesn't need him.

But, that's not the case.  I'm here with my wishes and dreams and shelves and boxes full of books...Lonely.  In the last 4 years everything has blown up in my face over and over again.  I keep trying and trying to put everything back together with glue and glitter and fancy duct tape, but it just doesn't hold.  This desert is like a field of land mines, no matter what direction I go in I lead my family right into another one.  

I wish that I could fix it.  I wish I could take the pain and fear away.  I know of only one way to do it though, and I just don't have the means.
I feel so selfish that I am thinking about everything I will lose.  I have to stop and think about what possibilities it opens up for everyone else.

I wish that I was not the most F'd up person I know!

Storms and Rainbows

Things have been a little rough lately.  I know they will get better but as always it's a little hard to see the rainbow during the storm.
A lot has happened since I last blogged (Do I say that at the beginning of every post?).  I have taken a few trips and had some fun.  In January Bug and I met my best friend in Seattle and I stayed there while Bug went to Mexico with my Brother and his family ( I think I already mentioned that and promised to blog about that later...hmmmmm, maybe next time).  I also took a trip to Alaska to see my Father and Sister (and everyone else) in March.  I took MJ with.  She did very well on the plane.  It was the layovers in between the plane rides that she was a terror.  We also went to Firth for Easter to visit Mike's family and friends.  That was a particularly hard trip for me. 
All in all - through the good and the bad I have learned a lot of unpleasant things about myself.  I am working on them, but I am not ready to re-hash all that right now.  Mainly because I am in a public library right now and don't want to cry in here with all these people.
I'll post more next time I come (can't at home on account of no Internet anymore), just wanted everyone to know that I am alive.
Good thoughts and prayers needed!
Thanks!

It's been a while

I haven't blogged in a while because, simply, I'm lazy.  Lately I'd much rather be sleeping than doing much of anything else.  Sleeping and eating.  So of course it comes as no great surprise that I have gained a TON of weight!  Happily, though, when I apprehensively stepped on my scale today I found that I had lost 3.4 pounds!  Yup, that .4 counts!  So now I still have to lose 10 more pounds to get back to where I started about 2 years ago.  Not so coincidentally, MJ will be 2 in 2 months!  I'm super excited!  I wish my family could be here to celebrate with us though!  I had a big trip planned to go back to AK this summer, but during these last 2 months a few events have changed ALL my plans!  Mike is no longer getting deployed, which is both good and bad.  Good for obvious reasons, bad because we really needed the extra money that comes from being deployed in a dangerous place and separated from your family.  On the upside we did get a substantial tax return that helped pay a ton of bills!  Downside is that we will not have the money to fly all of us to AK.  SAW also got into a bit of trouble last month.  Out of respect for him I will not go into it, but I will say he has been home from school with MJ and I for 2 weeks now & I really need for him to get back to school!
I am staring at my entertainment center looking at all the junk that gets piled here...  am I not allowed to have a clutter free vertical surface?  My kitchen counters, bar, dining room table and both end table are all cluttered with so much junk we barely have a space to set our drinks, let alone eat dinner.  With all the stressful things we've had going on I MUST get back to my Positive Changes thing.  I may have to go back through my list and make sure I am still good to go with everything I did before.  My thing for today is to work on my posture.  I have been having a lot of back pain lately and I think that if I could fix my posture it might not be so painful.  Of course one of the big issues with my back pain is that we have a waterbed...  can't fix that right now though, gotta have money.
It really is true that money is the root of all evil.  If it weren't for money I wouldn't have been disappointed when the deployment got cancelled, I wouldn't have to tell my kids no all the time, I would NOT be out of cereal right now either!
Anyways, lots to blog about and tons of pictures from my trip to Seattle to post.  See you soon!